As Valentine’s Day draws near, I’ve been thinking a lot about those old commercials and the message they conveyed. And, no, it wasn’t about making a long distance call back when those things were expensive. I’m thinking more about the way people have touched my life and how I hope I am able to touch the lives of others as well.

As a girl reared in the fifties and taught the socially acceptable role of women at that time, I’ve often wrestled with the push/pull of doing for others. There’ve been many instances in my life when I felt like a doormat—too afraid to say “no” and, although outwardly saying “yes,” simmering with resentment inside. Believe me, this is an awful feeling. And it is self-perpetuating. The more you say “yes” to things you don’t want to do, the more people feel free to ask.

Now that I’m well past fifty, the doormat syndrome is, thankfully, long gone. As Suzanne Braun Levine writes in her rich and informative book, 50 is the New Fifty, it is by learning to say “no” that we can truly say “yes” and mean it. So, now when I’m asked to do something I have a choice: I can either decline without guilt (mostly, that is) or accept with a full and joyous heart. Another amazing gift of age!

So with my full and joyous heart, I would like to reach out and touch all of you. Over the two plus years I’ve been blogging, I’ve connected with extraordinary women; women from across the country and even around the world; women who have lifted me up when I felt down and women who have encouraged me when I needed it. I wish each of you a Happy Valentine’s Day, the love of family and friends, and the gift of touching lives. What a wonderful way to celebrate Valentine’s Day and thrive in all our fullness on the Feisty Side of Fifty!