Enter Chico’s. Although this company doesn’t specifically brand its products “for the mature woman,” it seems the majority of its clientele are probably boomers. With generous sizing, brighter colors, and styles that flatter figures larger than a size 2, it’s become the go-to store for many of us on the far side of fifty.

I’ve become a customer myself and now receive a monthly catalogue. The latest arrived a few days ago and, as I was thumbing through the pages, I had an epiphany. No, it wasn’t about the latest trends in style and pattern—my inner fashionista has definitely seen better days. My a-ha moment had to do with the models.

First off, I wish the women they chose to represent the Chico’s customer looked a bit more like us. Of course models need to be slender and pretty to show off the clothes to best advantage, but these young women actually were a size 2 or even smaller! And, believe me, there was nary a hint of a laugh-line, muffin-top, or droopy bottom in any of the photos.

Nevertheless I was pleased with the images. Why? Because—contrary to the fashion credo—the models were actually smiling! Yes, every photo displayed a woman who seemed happy and engaged in her life. Compare these pictures with some of the high fashion shots where the models look either bored, haughty, or like they’ve just eaten something that disagreed with them. (The truth is—they’ve probably gone without eating for so long they can’t help but appear disengaged and sour.)

So here’s the insight I’ve gained from my Chico’s catalogue: Women our age really do smile and it’s better to boast a few pounds and a couple of wrinkles than to walk around looking like sourpuss. Give me some color, a bit of fun, and a happy outlook any day. And, on that note, I hope each of you enjoyed a very Happy Mother’s Day!

There are tons of reasons why this is true. Some of these causes for celebration, like the social influence and clout our numbers provide, are legendary. With a grateful nod to our population bulge, we boomers continue our revolutionary ways: shattering outmoded social norms, molding the culture to our liking, and reinventing the role for what it means to be a post-50 citizen. (Which other generation could boast of forgoing the rocking chair in favor of the rock concert?)

But my thoughts are of a personal nature and I, for one, am grateful for the small things. Here is my list of seven reasons why I consider myself blessed to be a boomer:

1)     I’ve never had to consider piercing anything on my body beyond my earlobes.

2)     For much of my life, when I phoned customer service, I immediately spoke with an actual, flesh and blood person! Plus, (and big bonus here) they were trained to be polite and helpful.

3)     When I was young, there were no entertainment centers—no multiple switches, remotes, wires, and unintelligible manuals. There was a TV with rabbit ears, a dial, and one, elegantly simple, on/off switch.

4)     I’ve never had to deal with the heartbreak of a full-blown Internet addiction.

5)     I remember when people used real words and not just unpronounceable acronyms.

6)     Sixties’ and Seventies’ rock ‘n’ roll was the BEST and I know, without a doubt, that we boomers have never lacked for cool.

7)     We continue to be the grooviest generation on the planet.

So, what do you think? What are the ways you express your boomer bravado? How are you putting gold into your golden years? Whatever you’re doing, you can be grateful for being born into a remarkable generation. Let’s let those whippersnappers know we’re not about to drift silently into the margins of society. To the contrary, let’s shout it loud and proud: boomers forever!

But the big news for society is of course that we’re the boomers—the mightiest generation to ever hit the planet—and we’re not taking any of that crap!

So there I am going about my business one day when I hear the familiar sound of my mail carrier’s truck. Hoping for a message from a friend, I race out to the mailbox as fast as my fifty-plus legs can take me. (Just to be clear, I don’t have fifty legs… I couldn’t quite figure out the correct word order—but I trust you get my drift.)

Rather than the anticipated letter, however, there in the pile of junk mail and ads was a message of another sort… one that took my breath away. It was from a magazine I hadn’t subscribed to in years. They wanted me back and must have decided upon some clever marketing scheme aimed at garnering my business.

Now my guess is that the author of this cunning ploy had to be young, probably male, and absolutely clueless because there on the outside of the envelope in great big bold print stood the words that burned my eyes like a hot poker: YOU QUALIFY FOR THE SENIOR CITIZEN OFFER—DETAILS INSIDE!

Yes, I’m proud of my generation. Yes, I’ve come to terms with most of the changes to my body and my looks brought on by age.  And, yes, I’m a champion for the feisty side of fifty. But PUH-LEASE, leave my mailbox alone! Keep your offers to yourself or this ol’ gal just might suggest where you can stuff ‘em.

Well, that’s my rant for the day—I’d love to hear yours. I know you’ve got them because, without a doubt, there’s a whole lot of reasons to get feisty once you’re on the far side of fifty!

So why not let your own voice be heard? Why not share your personal tale with a mass audience? If you’ve got an anecdote about aging and menopause, have I got the perfect forum for you!  Not Your Mother’s Book on Menopause will be your chance to contribute humorous, inspiring, and even edgy tales of how you’ve traveled that rather rocky road to true maturity.

There are some guidelines you’ll need to follow. Stories need to be true accounts, written in the first person, and between 500 and 1500 words. (There are a few additional requirements you’ll want to check out.) Otherwise, have fun; unleash all that creativity that blossoms in midlife and let menopause be your muse.

When you’ve finished, submit your story here—be sure to click on the book title for menopause. (When the book is published, a brief epilogue will appear after your story where you can share information about yourself, your blog, or additional activities you’d like to promote.)

So have at it and enjoy! Let’s let the world know that our flower power is now in full bloom. In fact, in true boomer fashion, our generation is taking the “pause” out of menopause. And Not Your Mother’s Book on Menopause will be a celebration of the ground-breaking, revolutionary, and very feisty side of fifty—won’t you add your voice to the revolution?

In most ways, we were right. Our gender has gone on to make major inroads in both the private and the public sectors. No longer chained to the kitchen, we’ve traded in our aprons for tool belts and computer chips, and moved from charity bake sales to the trading floors of Wall Street.

Nevertheless, in other ways, women can never compete with men. Men are just downright better off. If you don’t believe the previous statement, here are several reasons why the guys have it so great:

• Same work, more pay.
• They get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
• Wrinkles add character.
• They can open all of their own jars.
• Car mechanics tell them the truth.
• Their underwear is  $8.95 for a three-pack.
• The same hairstyle and clothes last for years, maybe decades.
• A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
• They can play with toys all of their life.
• They can wear shorts no matter how their legs look.
• They only have to shave their face and neck.
• They have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

And my personal favorite…

• The world is their urinal. They never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky!!!

Recently I received one of those “remember when” emails… and it took my breath away! The ghost of Christmas past temporarily roasted my chestnuts as it made me remember some of the aspects of the good old days that weren’t always so “good.”  You’ll likely find these shocking too–but here’s what Madison Avenue was pitching when we were tots:

Rather then sliding down the chimney, this Jolly Ol’ St. Nick preferred to smoke like one.

What woman could resist a wish list like this? In fact the ad suggests crying, “just a little… not a lot” if your husband doesn’t immediate run to the store and fill your holiday stocking with one these treasures.

And, when you finally get all of the modern laborsaving devices of your dreams, you’ll definitely need your vitamins!

After this merry trip down memory lane, I wish each of you holidays filled with good cheer. Happy Chanukah and a warm and wonderful Christmas. And here’s to a hearty “ho-ho-ho” at how far we’ve come… if nothing else, this ought to make your sleigh bells ring!

Even the fires that once roasted our chestnuts may have dampened over the years. In fact, some in our generation might confess that a growing inability to locate their groove thing has rendered mistletoe to becoming merely another piece of hanging plant material—devoid of romantic properties and just one more thing to dust.

But, before we all start shouting, “BAH!” let’s consider some of the ways the holidaze can be fun and festive—

Grandchildren: The absolutely #1 reason to enjoy the season is through the eyes of your grandchildren. These precious objects of any granny’s affections are sure to add a glow to your check and put the magic back into the holidays. Their delight is more than enough to warm your heart in a big, big way!

Reconnecting: Even though writing cards can be a chore, it’s wonderful to hear from those who were once a part of our lives but now live in distant places. This annual custom of catching up on one another’s lives is one I treasure and, I’m guessing, you do, too.

Taking Time for Fun: Parties and gatherings abound at this time of year. Carving out time from overloaded schedules to relax and enjoy friends and family is truly a cause to make merry…as long as you can avoid the fruitcake!

You Get to Flaunt Your Feisty: If you want to add a bit of feisty to the mix, drop by the Feisty Boomer Boutique and pick up a groovy, one-of-a-kind gift for your friends or a special treat for yourself. This bountiful boomer selection includes mugs, tees, totes, and more with psychedelic designs that are guaranteed to recharge any recipient’s flower power.

So here’s a ho-ho-holiday toast to the season—despite the stress, the crowds, and the cold, it really can be the most wonderful time of the year!

But, for me, the holiday that remains as much fun as ever is Halloween. Who can resist a six-year-old witch tramping up to your doorstep, broomstick in hand, demanding candy? And, if you’re a grandparent, there’s nothing more precious than seeing the object of your affection fully costumed, covered with face paint, and ready to roam the neighborhood in search of goodies.

Moreover Halloween offers some pretty special grown-up treats. I’m delighted to share one of the best—certain to make your inner witch cackle with delight. The Martini Diva’s got a brand new book featuring creepy cocktails, devilishly delicious appetizers, and bone-chilling Halloween trivia that’s guaranteed to fill you with the spooky spirit. The Martini Diva’s Halloween Martinis & Munchies Book makes for the perfect gift, haunting your favorite hostess or friend with plenty of tasty recipes for a Halloween Happy Hour filled with bewitching fun.

I interviewed the Martini Diva as she shared about her book. She’s as colorful in person as on the pages of her book. So tune in for 15 minutes of wicked wit and wonderfully clever ideas for Halloween entertaining. Then check out her website and her book.

And, if your humbug isn’t quite as “bah” as mine, you’ll want to be certain to take a look at The Merry Martini Mixology Book. It’s filled with festive and fun ideas for your December entertaining. Actually, the Martini Diva’s holiday books might just turn this ol’ scrooge into a spirited and rampant reveler myself!

I recently enjoyed the opportunity of exercising said bone by reading Another Bad-Dog Book: Tales of Life, Love, and Neurotic Human Behavior—a compilation of wonderfully witty essays by Joni B. Cole. A woman on the Feisty Side of Fifty herself, Joni writes of the experiences midlife women encounter in everyday life. Who hasn’t known the embarrassment of a new beauty ritual gone wrong, the multiplicity of emotions a teenage daughter can provoke, or rediscovering a lost love only to find out what he’s like today? (Spoiler alert: he’s not the dashing young heartthrob of decades-long, romantic reveries.)

Joni writes of each of these experiences with a charming vulnerability and a singular perspective that may well test your body’s defenses against midlife incontinence. While reading Another Bad-Dog Book, I found myself laughing so hard I narrowly avoided a few accidents of my own. I also found my eyes misting over when Joni writes of her aging parents and memories of times past.

I had the real pleasure of interviewing Joni on Feisty Side of Fifty Radio. If you’d like to add 15-minutes of fun to your day, I invite you to take a listen. Then be certain to check out Joni’s website and take a look at her books. Another Bad-Dog Book will set your tail to wagging and drooling for more. At the very least… your menopausal funny bone will thank you for it.

Now it’s your turn to share. The co-publisher of several Chicken Soup for the Soul books, Dahlynn McKowen, has asked me to join her in gathering stories for a new anthology on this powerful rite of passage. Not Your Mother’s Book on Menopause will be your chance to contribute humorous, inspiring, and even edgy tales of how you’ve traveled the often rocky road to true maturity. As co-creator of the book, I’m excited to offer you the opportunity to get your work published and have your menopausal tale enjoyed by countless numbers of readers.

There are some guidelines you’ll need to follow. Stories need to be true accounts, written in the first person, and between 500 and 1500 words. (There are a few additional requirements you’ll want to check out.) Otherwise, unleash all that creativity that blossoms in midlife, have fun, and write up a snappy meno-memory you’d like to share with the world. And when you’ve finished, submit your story here—be sure to click on the book title for menopause. (When the book is published, a brief epilogue will appear after your story where you can share information about yourself, your blog, or additional activities you’d like to promote.)

As boomers, we’ve revolutionized most every other aspect of the culture… so why not experience the change in our own unique style? We’re definitely drawing upon our legendary flower-power to take the “pause” out of menopause and blast full steam ahead into life. So what better way to share your very own hot-flashing yarn than in a work entitled: “Not Your Mother’s Book on Menopause.”

Now, come to think of it, how feisty is that?!