What does an opportunity look like? Do you recognize one when it approaches? Do you see any lurking in the corners right now, waiting to be noticed?
It’s been over six years since Richard said, “Will you marry me?” I was sixty-two and had never been married. He was a 2-time widower seeking his third wife on . . . gulp . . . Craigslist. What could go wrong?
- Sometimes I felt like a laundress and a sous chef.
- He liked being in control
- He believed the man was the head of the household (as long as his wife allowed it.
On the other hand, a few things put me in the driver’s seat.
- He wasn’t meant to live alone.
- He was very clear about what he was looking for.
- We were both mature enough to listen and compromise. Slowly I learned to trust and love him.
Eight reasons why saying yes to Richard was both wise and life affirming:
- He laughs at my jokes as if I’ve opened up a new world for him.
- He respects me.
- He made me the proud stepmother of seven adult children and 15 little ones who call me Grandma Lynn. Love that label!
- His congregation—he’s a pastor on Sundays—loves asking my opinions about everything from budgeting issues to child rearing. And when a potluck ends, they clean up. Like Richard, they respect me.
- Whether I’m giving a ride to a church member with no car or picking up refreshments or dealing with the fact that he left his cell phone at home or asking him to help me wake up or open a jar, I love the sense of purpose I get from being his wife.
- He’s happy to have me pursue my own interests. I’ve published two books, continue to run Writer Advice, and completed more editing and coaching than ever since we’ve been a team. We treat Writer Advice, writeradvice.com like a business, and I love having someone to bounce my ideas off of.
- Whether we’re at a book festival or talking to a new waitress, Richard is a role model for striking up a conversation. I am a role model for saving money, which he wasn’t able to do while raising seven children. Our two different backgrounds blend beautifully.
- Richard taught me to accept myself.
You can do that too. With or without a partner.
- Get to know yourself.
- Learn what your strengths are.
- Acknowledge your weaknesses.
- Either live with them or change them. You get to decide.
Let me know how a relationship has made you a better fuller person in the comments below.
This guest post was graciously provided by Lynn Goodwin, owner of Writer Advice, www.writeradvice.com. Her manuscript, Never Too Late: From Wannabe to Wife at 62 was just released by Koehler Press.
She’s written You Want Me to Do WHAT? Journaling for Caregivers and Talent, which was short-listed for a Literary Lightbox Award, won a bronze medal in the Moonbeam Children’s Book Awards and was a finalist for a Sarton Women’s Book Award.
Goodwin’s work has appeared in Voices of Caregivers, Hip Mama, Dramatics Magazine, Inspire Me Today, The Sun, Good Housekeeping.com, Purple Clover.com and many other places. She is a reviewer and teacher at Story Circle Network, and she is an editor, writer and manuscript coach at Writer Advice.
Her book, Never Too Late: From Wannabe to Wife at 62 as available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or an Indie Bookstore. It will tell you all about finding your first husband at 62—and much more. Acceptance and love, mixed with tickles and kisses, made me a happier, more complete person.